Humans are weird.
I think we've pretty much confirmed that against all logic and reasoning, we, as human beings, are always going to have our weird little oddities that just make no sense, even when faced with truth and logic.
People who know me closely know that there is one thing that I actively try to do as rarely as possible: If I can avoid it, I try my very best never to smile. Oh I'm not saying that I don;t like being happy, and the corners of my mouth curl upwards fairly often, but if I can help it, then I do whatever I can to never part my lips and show my teeth. Why? Well, because to be fully honest, I have very bad teeth.
Aside from simply eating far too much sugary food throughout my life, and having not used proper brushing and flossing habits throughout probably the first 14 years of my existence, I was also subjected to numerous antibiotics when I was only a year old after having suffered a particularly nasty infection. Antibiotics that had a side effect of staining teeth in young children, mind you. And to top all of this off, I have never had braces. In fact, I only had my very first orthodontist's appointment about three weeks ago now.
Suffice to say, my teeth aren't exactly pretty. If I look at them objectively then they aren't the WORST teeth I've ever seen. After all, I used to visit my aunt in the Arkansas boonies every year. But they're a very pale grayish yellow, with varying and seemingly random thicknesses and they certainly aren't straight. in fact, some of them even seem to fold over onto one another.
They certainly aren't the pearly white teeth you see on Hollywood movie stars that everybody aspires for. In fact, it's almost painful when one of those commercials comes on that says "What is the most attractive part of the body that makes you look the youngest, happiest, and healthiest? A bright pearly smile!" Makes me want to punch the spokesman. Because the worst part about all this is that for the past four years or so I've been working overtime with special toothpastes and numerous dentist's visits to try and get my teeth to whiten, but alas, it just doesn't seem to be working.
And to me, it feels like every time I part my lips and show these oral bones to the world, a million pairs of eyes suddenly turn my way. Watching... Judging... Whispering behind my back...
That being said, the rational part of my mind knows that I am overreacting. The logical part of my mind tells me that there is no reason for me to keep my lips closed and to refrain from smiling and laughing among other people. I know for a fact that I am falling victim to the spotlight effect. (Gilovich, Medvec, Savitsky, 1998)
The spotlight effect. A horrible quirk of the mind where one believes that their flaws are out in the open for everybody to see and everybody points and laughs... despite the fact that nobody even really notices.
Because truthfully? I don't think I've ever had anybody comment on my teeth. I don't think I've ever had somebody bring up that I need to take better care of my teeth if I hadn't brought it up first. Nobody's ever asked me to "please close my mouth" or said anything like "why don't you go to the dentist once in a while?" Honestly, I really am fooling myself.
But alas, humans are silly creatures. And here I am, still keeping my lips closed. And despite the fact that I know all of this in the logical center of my brain, the rest of me just can't seem to get over these teeth. I wonder how long it'll be before I can finally get over myself?
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References:
Gilovich, T., Savitsky, K., & MEdvec, V.H. (1998). The illusion of transparency: Biased assessments of others' ability to read our emotional states. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 75, 332-346.
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